DEVONEARTH - Blog

6 Ways to SHOW the cuss UP for Yourself

9/19/2019

There is a lot of BS that we carry around...
I know I'm not alone here because I've sat down with hundreds of busy women and this is the #1 topic and strategy that I talk about!BS = Belief Systems and yes... sometimes Bull Shit too.
In the video below I have described the BACKPACK ANALOGY!
What is it? How does it affect us? What do we do about it? You'll even get to learn a little about me and my BS (as well as the habits).
This awareness and skill will help you feel lighter, clearer and more consciously in control of your world!

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Guided Meditation Debut!

7/23/2019

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This is the first time I am releasing a guided meditation to the public! Woo!
This meditation is meant to hope you connect back to the physical body and cultivate groundedness. Listen to this meditation in a comfortable space and see if it allows you to release stress and notice the support and nourishment provided to you from feeling a sense of grounding.
I hope this finds you well!

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Tarot Life Coaching in Action!

6/27/2019

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How to Choose a Tarot Deck!

6/4/2019

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Tarot: Life Coaching w. Pretty Pictures

5/30/2019

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How do I use the cards? Why?
Check out this video I made for you!
Ask me any additional questions you have!

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4 Beautiful Things I Learned From Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy

5/17/2019

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This is the story of how a little girl went from being constantly sick to healthy within a year (and then eventually to a bad-ass yogi tarot life coach, but I digress).
How you ask!?
Intense mindset and habit transformation.
Let me explain...

What is Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy?
It’s a mental disorder where a caregiver makes up or causes illness for someone they care for.

Disclaimer: My mother was a beautiful human with a beautiful heart. She was sensitive, caring and also conflicted due to years of hardcore trauma. I love her. I miss her. I forgive her. She gave me years of valuable lesson at a very young age. This is what I learned from her believing that I was far more sick than I ever was.

Though my memory from childhood is quite blurry (hello, trauma), I do remember the constant doctor visits, hospitals and surgeries. Once I was told I might have cancer… in my face. I watched my mom begin to mourn. Granted, some things needed fixing. Never mind that I was carrying the weight of poverty, abusive relationships, and shame of alcoholism with my mother (I knew far too many details) and our diet was mainly fast and boxed food. I had a minimally invasive heart surgery in 5th grade and my eyelid began to droop so we tightened that baby up.

I remember being questioned daily, sometimes hourly, about how I feel, which body part hurts, how much, is school an option, etc. By a fairly young age I was so intensely hyper aware of my body, inside and out. My mom believed I was sick and that only she understood. I needed her (and she needed me), Maybe I’ll write another article on codependency.
At some point, I started to realize many of these doctors were getting agitated. After so many tests came back ‘normal’ and yet this woman insisted her child was too sick to be a child. They’d remove her from the room and question me more.

I felt sick most days. I was too tired and achy for school and not much interested in playing. I don’t believe this was a conscious decision or effort being made by either of us. She believed that I was sick, sometimes dying, and I trusted her. Hell, I felt it!

Fast forward to age 14, I moved out of my mom’s house and into a completely different lifestyle. A couple from my church (who I still love dearly) took me in and holy shit… there were rules, boundaries, very little conflict, plenty of health, wealth and love to go around. My only responsibilities were school and chores. I discovered what vegetables actually looked like! They weren’t mushy at all unless canned and/or boiled to oblivion in salt and butter, of course.

Within a year, after intense unbrainwashing, I was pretty damn healthy… and better at math! I was told to challenge and question everything I knew to be true about myself and health. I was asked (okay, forced) to try new things and create new habits. Yes it took hours of tears and begging and hard boundary work but I was blessed enough to have these people willing to do the work with me.

All this to say, I learned three VALUABLE lessons from these years that I constantly use personally and with most (maybe all) of my clients:

Question every thought, feeling and belief you hold. Investigate it and then consciously decide if you want to keep it

Be in communication with your body… but don’t hyperfocus on every ache and pain. Focus on the habits you build to keep it healthy.

You have the power to create change. Mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Trauma is passed down. It’s not our fault but it is our responsibility to take healing action and break the chain.

We are all unique, but we do share similar lessons in this journey we call life. I was blessed to have awareness and hope at a young age and a supportive team to pull me through. No one needs to do this alone.
Not even you. I'm here to help.

Thank you for reading!
-Devon

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Reaction vs. response

2/14/2018

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My Reaction
My body tenses and sweats.
My chest closes in.
My breath catches.
My mind reminds me of all the 'reasons' I think I'm not okay.
I begin to layer on the armor- closing off from those around me.
My reaction causes a defend and attack cycle.
Words are my weapon.

Meanwhile, the core part of me watches in understanding compassion, another side in annoyance and dismay, but the shame and pain are sometimes too strong to stand against in the moment.
I've been here before, when the threat was real and the reaction may have saved my life.
Though, this time is different...
It's someone I love who tripped over my trigger line unknowingly.
The reaction and unnecessary defensive mechanisms of painful words don't seem to know the difference between past trauma and present 'threat.'

Welcome to the internal fixings of a trauma survivor.
We live in a traumatic, chaotic, negative, busy world. Whether it was physical, emotional, mental, sexual, or self abuse, a fender bender, a loss of a loved one, a scene of a movie, or a mixture of all or none of these; the majority of us has experienced some form of trauma.
How can we use this? Learn from it? Help ourselves rebirth out of harden cocoon we needed in the past. Well, all I can share with you is my practice. It's not perfect. It's messy. I fail and I hurt people. I apologize and share my processing. Then I try it all over again. I do my best to surround myself with people who understand, care and support me in my growth. I cultivate gratitude and express it.
Most importantly, I practice.

My Response to Practice
I sit and feel all the emotions.
I listen to all the thoughts.
I breath through the chaos and try to find the calm center inside of me.
I broaden my vision outside of the narrowing fears and pain.
I remind myself the present moment is a new moment and the past no longer threatens me.
I allow myself to go quiet if I feel I can't control my forked tongue.
I sift through the negative thoughts and feelings for the root fear and pain.
I wait.
I express my feelings without blame or anger.
I allow my heart to soften and melt into a puddle of vulnerability.
I allow myself to be seen and heard and remind myself I'm worthy of such.
I process.
I learn.
I heal.

I'm also not sure I've ever done all those steps 'successfully' in the moment. I annoy myself. I annoy others. Worst of all, I spread my pain. My go to reaction to that is telling myself I've failed, but maybe failure doesn't exist. Just maybe, I'm closer to staying in my vulnerable and loving self each time. Maybe, these reactions are here to teach me what I'm still healing. That is something I am grateful for, but fuck, it's hard work. I'm constantly retracing my steps to apologize and being offered a chance to share my past, struggle and process.

May we love all the pieces of our Self.
May we allow ourselves to heal in our own way.
May we trip on trigger lines and be tripped upon by loved ones.
May we find gratitude and opportunity in such experiences.

Namaste & Happy Valentine's Day!

-Devon

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Identity crisis of a tarot yogi

1/29/2018

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Oh, the identity our mind creates!
It's in every spiritual book, the question of all questions, "Who are you?"
They aren't asking us what we do, what our name is, or even who we think we are. Rather, who we really are. Now, that's a whole of mystical higher consciousness conversation for another time. Right now, I'm interested in the "who we think we are" gist.
Backstory: I had dreadlocks. Long, beautiful, unique, distinguishing dreadlocks... that happened to be really damn heavy and give my head/neck aches. So, away they went. I'm a practical person after all (and one that believes in residual energy).
Cue quarter-life identity crisis! Who am I?!
I blend into Durham now, my ice-breaker is gone, my hippie kudos- out the window. Who did I think I was? Why did I feel like these dreads gave me superpowers? Why did I feel the need to hide behind them? Much less, what were those tomboy fears growing up again? Oh right, that'd I'd be mistaken as a male forever.
Who am I? Right then, I was a dread-less and confused lady, finalizing a divorce that seemed to rip my world in two and leading me into being an adult and mother on my own for the first time.
The cherry on top? My passion is to share what wisdom and practice I have stumbled upon in this life through tarot and yoga. To be a source of safe sacred space for people to re-find themselves, reclaim and cleanse their energy, and focus on ways to live their best lives.
Fast forward a couple months, I'm still a little confused, still dread-less, still divorcing, still being a single mom, still sharing my passions with the world, but I've also come to a new conclusion that I've logically known all long.
*I am ever-changing, ever-growing, always whole, and always my best self.* The messier the better. That's how we really grow. Even through all the spiritual journeying and reading and practices, I still got caught up in the unconscious beliefs that I AM this physical appearance and momentary emotions I am feeling, but my gracious, I am so much more complex than that.
Yoga keeps me in touch with my body and mind, the feels, and the balance.
Tarot clarifies, refines, and directly points to areas of myself that feel lovely and deserve celebration or right where I need healing.
So, who I am? Even if I told you right now, it would be inaccurate by tomorrow. Even if I tried to consciously perceive my connection to all of life and the universe, words wouldn't do it justice.
Instead, I am doing my best to honor the process, show up authentically, and share all I can.

Thank you for listening.
:)

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6 Ways to SHOW the cuss UP for Yourself

How To Find Deeper Balance!

WTF is in Your Backpack?!

Guided Meditation Debut!

Tarot Life Coaching in Action!

How to Choose a Tarot Deck!

Tarot: Life Coaching w. Pretty Pictures

How do I use the cards? Why?
Check out this video I made for you!
Ask me any additional questions you have!

4 Beautiful Things I Learned From Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy

Reaction vs. response

Identity crisis of a tarot yogi

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How do I use the cards? Why? Check out this video I made for you!Ask me any additional questions you have!

Author

Archives

Categories

How do I use the cards? Why?
Check out this video I made for you!
Ask me any additional questions you have!